My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I want her autograph on my taint
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
