Me too!
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
He has the fingertips of a God
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