It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
