just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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