Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
