You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
