this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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