My room smells like vodka and shame
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
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