you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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