i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
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I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
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In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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