You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
