i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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