you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
How external is "for external use only"?
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
