Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
