wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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