Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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