Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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