I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
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