for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
