I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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