If i come over, it means nothing
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
