I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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