Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
