You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
