just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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