3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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