Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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