I just cut my nipple shaving
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize