so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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