Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
