Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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