so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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