All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
What drink are we having for lunch?
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
