I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
