I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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