All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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