you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
