There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so much tequila, so little girl.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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