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Say something about gay babies.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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