white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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