your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize