do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
