I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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