The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Randomize