dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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