weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize