Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I looked at my own cervix.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
