After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Randomize
