i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
