Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I think I died a long time ago.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
