what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
