My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
